The difference between the subtle mind exercise and the loving-kindness exercise is success and failure. I had an extremely difficult time with the loving-kindness exercise, but I found the subtle mind exercise to be therapeutic and transforming! The subtle mind helped me to focus. This morning, I really looked forward to doing this exercise. I feel so stressed, and my mind is just everywhere. I am worrying about everything going on in my life, and I was completely frazzled.
I said a little prayer before engaging in the subtle mind exercise. I prayed that I would experience the benefits of a subtle mind because it seems like the cure for many of my anxiety problems. Of course, my mind wandered in a million different directions, but each and every time, I brought it back to the focus of breathing which forced me to let go of the thoughts that often consume me! I really did not feel frustrated at all during this exercise.
I like to add my own little spin on these exercises, so that they are in line with my beliefs and values. It is very easy to do because the goal of these exercises are very much in line with my beliefs. I am not supposed to be anxious or worry (Philippians 4:6). I am supposed to be still (Psalms 46:10). By focusing on my breathing, I take my mind away from these worries, and focus on the rise and fall of my stomach (diaphragmatic breathing would focus more on the stomach moving up and down rather than the chest).
The connection between spiritual, mental, and physical wellness cannot be distinguished from one another. They are all interconnected and affect each other. When one is not in balance, the others will not be either. This can be seen in me through many different aspects. For instance, I was eating paleo, losing weight, and feeling great. Mentally, I was in a great place. I felt more optimistic, had an overall sense of well-being. Physically, I felt great, wasn't suffering from joint pain, and was not suffering from acid reflux. I have not been eating well for a few months, and now my body is back to the old problems of joint pain and acid reflux. I have also gained a lot of weight back. Mentally, I have been feeling depressed and defeated. Spiritually, all I feel is empty and unfulfilled because I lack the motivation and energy to change it. The thing is that I know all of the right things to do, but I am having the most difficult time doing any of it. I cannot change this unless I begin with a mental change because changing the way that I think is the only way that I can change my behaviors. It is extremely difficult. There is a driving force much deeper than knowledge that forces us to make changes. It is deeper than how we feel physically. I believe that driving force is spiritual.
Thank you,
Amy
Monday, September 23, 2013
Tuesday, September 17, 2013
Loving-Kindness
Before participating in the loving-kindness exercise, I read what I was going to do, and I thought that it sounded pretty strange. Plus, I had to think of people that I do not care for or might even consider enemies. Of course, I thought my husband of nearly ten years when it was suggested to think about an individual that I love. My faucet of loving-kindness did not flow as if it were fully turned on so much as a slight trickle. It is not to say that I do not love my husband dearly, but it is not about feelings, and I just had a difficult time focusing.
So I began to think of all that he does for me. The faucet began to flow a little more freely. Then suddenly, I am told to turn these thoughts toward myself. What? I do not feel for myself what I feel for my husband, but I tried to let go of the negative thoughts when I was directed to turn these loving feelings inward. I continued with deep breaths, and took notice of the warm sensation in my body. It was relaxing and calming.
When I directed to look at the background, I heard the waves, and I envisioned myself as a beach, and the waves come rushing into me which represented all of these people and thoughts in my life. They kept coming, but it was not unsettling so much as a representation of the waves and myself existing together without chaos. In fact, it was peaceful. It was just the quiet, calm sound of the waves.
When I reached the part that instructed me to breath in the suffering of my enemies, and breath out peace and comfort, it was more difficult. My first few breaths felt warm and fiery. I began to think of the suffering that my enemies have endured, and I felt empathy towards them, and was able to breath out a little easier and more freely.
I really felt odd doing this exercise. I had to force myself to feel a specific way, and it was not comfortable. I will continue doing this exercise in order to think more outwardly rather than self-centeredly. I benefitted from this exercise by thinking of those whom I do not care for, and identifying with the fact that they suffer, too. I would recommend this exercise to others because it might work well for some people. There are few people out there that do not need to learn to be less selfish. This world would be a much better place if we stopped thinking so much about ourselves and our own needs, and consider others and their needs.
The concept of a mental workout is to develop our psychospiritual lives. In order to do this, we need to practice on a daily basis. As we continue to practice, we see results. Mental workouts result in health, happiness, and wholeness. Through implementing mental workouts, my psychological health can increase through discovering unhealthy patterns or behaviors and changing them.
Thank you!
Amy
So I began to think of all that he does for me. The faucet began to flow a little more freely. Then suddenly, I am told to turn these thoughts toward myself. What? I do not feel for myself what I feel for my husband, but I tried to let go of the negative thoughts when I was directed to turn these loving feelings inward. I continued with deep breaths, and took notice of the warm sensation in my body. It was relaxing and calming.
When I directed to look at the background, I heard the waves, and I envisioned myself as a beach, and the waves come rushing into me which represented all of these people and thoughts in my life. They kept coming, but it was not unsettling so much as a representation of the waves and myself existing together without chaos. In fact, it was peaceful. It was just the quiet, calm sound of the waves.
When I reached the part that instructed me to breath in the suffering of my enemies, and breath out peace and comfort, it was more difficult. My first few breaths felt warm and fiery. I began to think of the suffering that my enemies have endured, and I felt empathy towards them, and was able to breath out a little easier and more freely.
I really felt odd doing this exercise. I had to force myself to feel a specific way, and it was not comfortable. I will continue doing this exercise in order to think more outwardly rather than self-centeredly. I benefitted from this exercise by thinking of those whom I do not care for, and identifying with the fact that they suffer, too. I would recommend this exercise to others because it might work well for some people. There are few people out there that do not need to learn to be less selfish. This world would be a much better place if we stopped thinking so much about ourselves and our own needs, and consider others and their needs.
The concept of a mental workout is to develop our psychospiritual lives. In order to do this, we need to practice on a daily basis. As we continue to practice, we see results. Mental workouts result in health, happiness, and wholeness. Through implementing mental workouts, my psychological health can increase through discovering unhealthy patterns or behaviors and changing them.
Thank you!
Amy
Tuesday, September 10, 2013
My Own Wellness
Here is where it gets personal. I would love to say that I am a 10 physically, spiritually, and psychologically, but that is just not the case at this point in life. To be brutally honest (brutally towards myself), physically I would rate myself at a 5, but definitely working my way down if I don't make some changes in the near future. Spiritually, I would rate myself a 1, not really getting worse, but definitely not getting better. Psychologically, I would give myself a 3-4 although I have made vast improvements in this are throughout the past two years.
Physically, my greatest goal is to nourish my body properly. It is so easy to shove any and all food in my mouth. My body feels the difference between nourishment and gluttony. When I am well-nourished, I feel energetic, happy, and hopeful. When I eat to satisfy cravings, I feel lethargic, bloated, and miserable. In order to accomplish this goal, it will be important to plan and prepare grocery lists and meals in advance.
Spiritually, I gave myself a 1 because I still have certain and specific beliefs, but I spend no time in prayer or even reading the Bible. How can I maintain my spiritual life without an spiritual ingredients? My spiritual goal is to take at least 15 minutes each morning to read my Bible and pray.
I can wake up just 15 minutes early to get that time alone.
Psychologically, I have made great strides. I have struggled with depression/anxiety my entire adult life. I am no longer on medication, and when I feel a panic attack rearing it's ugly head, I recite 2 Timothy 1:7 over and over. It goes as follows: "God has not given to us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love, and a sound mind." This helps to distract my mind and calm me down. However, my self-esteem has been lacking lately. My goal psychologically is to remind myself of Psalms 139:10 each time I have thoughts of self-doubt. "I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works, and my soul well knows it." This can replace my thoughts of inadequacy and inferiority.
This relaxation exercise seemed a bit strange to me. However, the calm, quiet voice directing my thoughts was successful at relaxing. At the end, I did feel tired, though. Once I opened my eyes and stretched, I did feel more energy and rejuvenated, but prior to that, I was ready for a nap! I had a bit of a difficult time focusing on the colors because they were symbolic. When he got to the part where I was supposed to say that I feel loved, it bothered me. It is not that my husband and children do not love me, but I feel unappreciated most of the time. It distracted me, and I felt a little upset at that moment. Once I moved past that, I was able to benefit from the remaining exercises. This exercise probably will not go on my personal relaxation exercise list.
Physically, my greatest goal is to nourish my body properly. It is so easy to shove any and all food in my mouth. My body feels the difference between nourishment and gluttony. When I am well-nourished, I feel energetic, happy, and hopeful. When I eat to satisfy cravings, I feel lethargic, bloated, and miserable. In order to accomplish this goal, it will be important to plan and prepare grocery lists and meals in advance.
Spiritually, I gave myself a 1 because I still have certain and specific beliefs, but I spend no time in prayer or even reading the Bible. How can I maintain my spiritual life without an spiritual ingredients? My spiritual goal is to take at least 15 minutes each morning to read my Bible and pray.
I can wake up just 15 minutes early to get that time alone.
Psychologically, I have made great strides. I have struggled with depression/anxiety my entire adult life. I am no longer on medication, and when I feel a panic attack rearing it's ugly head, I recite 2 Timothy 1:7 over and over. It goes as follows: "God has not given to us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love, and a sound mind." This helps to distract my mind and calm me down. However, my self-esteem has been lacking lately. My goal psychologically is to remind myself of Psalms 139:10 each time I have thoughts of self-doubt. "I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works, and my soul well knows it." This can replace my thoughts of inadequacy and inferiority.
This relaxation exercise seemed a bit strange to me. However, the calm, quiet voice directing my thoughts was successful at relaxing. At the end, I did feel tired, though. Once I opened my eyes and stretched, I did feel more energy and rejuvenated, but prior to that, I was ready for a nap! I had a bit of a difficult time focusing on the colors because they were symbolic. When he got to the part where I was supposed to say that I feel loved, it bothered me. It is not that my husband and children do not love me, but I feel unappreciated most of the time. It distracted me, and I felt a little upset at that moment. Once I moved past that, I was able to benefit from the remaining exercises. This exercise probably will not go on my personal relaxation exercise list.
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